I am healing and embracing each day of increased energy. Returning home from Germany has certainly settled my mind, body, and spirit; there truly is no place like home. There has been emotional moments, but this is too be expected. Last week on Wednesday was a particularly difficult day, especially for Curtis. His spirit was left broken and hope far out of reach; it was heartbreaking to watch. That night, I had a lot of alone time to think about life and our future. In general I am a hopeful person, but I have dialed deeply into hope over the past nearly five years since being diagnosed. Wednesday night, as 11:00 pm approached, which is extremely late for me to be up, I retired to my bed. As I lay in bed, there was a smile that adorned my face. I was silently repeating a mantra I often repeat as I drift off to sleep. Then it hit me. I want to have unwavering hope and a belief I WILL find health just as I did in my fundraising efforts to get treatment in Germany. You see, I always knew and believed it was possible to raise the money needed - I NEVER wavered, I just trusted it would happen in perfect timing. And so it did. So there it is, I am digging deeper than ever before to gain absolute unwavering faith that I will find health, in its perfect time. I know this will require patience. . I am so focused on inviting in positive energy from my higher power and deeply rooting myself into life and finding balance.
Since that tearful Wednesday night, wonderful things have started opening up around me. Ask. Believe. Receive. is in full force in my life. I am working to be increasingly and fully present in each moment. Enjoying the small and large pieces of my life. Laughing even more than before. Continuing to not take myself too serious - which too brings laughter. I am riding a wave of blessings at this moment and rising above the challenges that may cross my path. While this may not sound like something new and unique for me, I will tell you that something has shifted for me - I feel it. I get goose bumps when speaking of it. It makes sense to me and that is what is significant.
Curtis is doing much better; this is a process that is heartbreaking for our family at moments. I am filled with gratitude to have family and friends that continue to love and nurture us through this time of transition. Things that Curtis and I thought were not possible for many years are coming together rapidly and bringing much eagerness into our lives. It is amazing how things fall into place, in their perfect timing, as the universe aligns and we become one. Thank you to everyone that continues to pray, send positive healing energy, and love our direction. We need this; we do feel surrounded by love.
Today, I am hopeful~